Since Wednesday, March 15, 2023 (Beware the Ides!) I have been seen by healthcare professionals a total of 17 times at various psychiatric facilities in the area. Once I began perceiving/hearing threats from nearby, I started calling 9-1-1. This is described in ThE VoIcEs. My diagnoses have ranged from paranoid-schizophrenia to “stalking victim.” A comprehensive guide to the most popular psychiatric healthcare facilities in the State of New York; Counties of Manhattan, Queens, & Nassau:
-The first hospital that declared me, “sane,” and declined to admit me to their CPEP. (Visit #1)
-Actually diagnosed me as a, “Stalking Victim,” (~Visit #13)
-Served as a place of safe refuge when my estranged lover was sending me death threats, however sexy (~Visit #16)
-The first hospital to admit me to their psychiatric ward (Visit #2)
-Quick turnarounds
-No psychiatric floor (afaik)
-Quick to admit to CPEP
-Bunk-style sleeping with the other crazies
-Omg. Kosher hospital? The salmon!
-Seriously, the best krazy kuisine on this landmass.
-Just get the salmon.
-The OTHER hospital that declined to admit me, based off ThE TeXtS (~Visit #14)
-Literally the smallest CPEP I’ve been in. It doesn’t get as packed as QG (since fewer NYC-razies) but there’s not even a clear path to pace around the grounds.
-They have a patio/crazy people prison yard
-Part of my reunification theory with The One (~Visit #10)
-“One Flew Over the Cuckoo’s Nest” -vibes
North Shore University Hospital
-Reattached my right arm (~Visit #11)
-You gotta take the Nassau Inter-County Express / NICE Bus
-Longest # of nights I’ve slept continuously in Manhattan, since moving away in Jan 2021 (~Visit #12)
-Full-floor of a midmodern highrise for you to pace around a closed loop, chasing your demons
-The psych ward is on the ~12th floor: Movin’ on Up
-The building is very “80’s”
-After they release you, when you stumble back into society, there is no subway service west of 8th Avenue
-Rebuilt my Amazon-ravaged ACL/LCL
-ER is PACKED they are TOO close to the East Village
-All-you-can-eat snax provided during ceremonial Snacking Periods (graham crackers, chicken AND tuna fish sandwiches)
-It’s in Deep (but pre-Flushing) Queens
-After they release you, when you stumble back into society, if you are headed to Flushing, you have to double back on a Manhattan-bound 7 train, as “The Flushing-bound platform at [the 82nd St-Jackson Heights] station was closed for renovation on May 6, 2024, and will remain closed through the first quarter of 2025.”
-I hope you like the vegan-friendly plant proteins offered by NYC Health + Hospitals/say goodbye to meat
-My doctor was a real see you next tuesday, tried taking me off Adderall (Visit #15)
NYU Langone Hospital – Long Island
-Mineola, Lawn Guyland, right by the L-I-double-R
-Kosher dinners of eggplant parmesan, 4 nights running
-Kosher breakfasts of an egg & cheese omelet, 4 mornings running
-I don’t even know if they have a CPEP. I got run over by a car and woke up here.